We’ve been discussing some, over the last few weeks, Christians and social issues. I wanted to take some time to talk about marriage.
For many, this issue became of importance when some began pressing for the legalization of same sex marriage. I think things have been in a mess far longer than that.
Many countries have a clear separation of civil and religious aspects when it comes to marriage. There is a civil ceremony, which is the legally binding act. There is a separate religious service, which allows each person to have a ceremony in accordance with their beliefs.
In the United States, we have the strange situation of church and State overlapping with one another. Unless I’m mistaken, a wedding is the only officially recognized act that a minister can perform. Baptisms have no legal status. Ministers take part in funerals, but the State gives that no particular validation.
What’s even more puzzling, a minister can marry you, but he has no say in divorce proceedings. In what way does that make sense?
This has gone on for so long that the church accepts the situation as normal. It’s not. The State has no say in who can and can’t be baptized. The State doesn’t determine who is eligible to take the Lord’s Supper. If we believe marriage to be a religious act, we should not align ourselves with the State when it comes time for a wedding.
Would it be helpful if we switched to a system of dual ceremonies, a civil ceremony and a religious one? That would free the church to set its own standards and relieve ministers of the burden of being an agent of the State in any capacity. It would also empower the church, I think, to better address the question of divorce.
Or how we can we better separate that which is holy from that which is not?
The only benefit of the state’s involvement in marriage is its provision for determining allocation of material assets and access to children when the marriage fails. Of course, in a perfect world, the church would act as arbiter when the couple forsake their commitment to the Lord and the relationship.
My family has experienced two divorces (no children) with one pending (with a child). Unfortunately, the church is being excluded from this latest action, due to the hurt feelings caused by faulty speaking/hearing. In these preliminary agreements reason and a mutually shared care for the child ( maintain a friendly atmosphere) seem to strongly influence the final decree.
Short of the state withdrawing totally from marriage, perhaps the best solution is for the breakup of the marriage is overseen by the church with a simple, legal, proclamation to the state that this marriage has come to an end. This is so the state can keep its records up to date but with no supervisory function.
Pingback: Where church and State diverge: Marriage | TimothyArcher.com/Kitchen
Pingback: Putting divorce into the church’s hands | Tim Archer's Kitchen of Half-Baked Thoughts
Pingback: Separating church from state in marriage | Tim Archer's Kitchen of Half-Baked Thoughts