Yesterday morning, while doing some reading for an upcoming writing project, I sat down and wrote this:
TIM DOESN’T WANT TO BE LIKE JESUS
That thought struck me while reading the book “Myth of a Christian Nation” by Gregory Boyd (an EXCELLENT read, by the way). I don’t really want to be like Jesus. Man of sorrows? Suffering servant? Lamb that was slain… are you kidding me? I want to be the conquering Lion of Judah, not the Lamb that is worthy because of his sacrifice. He was nailed to a cross! Can any of us say we truly want to travel that road?
““But I say to you who hear, Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you. To one who strikes you on the cheek, offer the other also, and from one who takes away your cloak do not withhold your tunic either. Give to everyone who begs from you, and from one who takes away your goods do not demand them back. And as you wish that others would do to you, do so to them. “If you love those who love you, what benefit is that to you? For even sinners love those who love them. And if you do good to those who do good to you, what benefit is that to you? For even sinners do the same. And if you lend to those from whom you expect to receive, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, to get back the same amount. But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return, and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, for he is kind to the ungrateful and the evil. Be merciful, even as your Father is merciful. “Judge not, and you will not be judged; condemn not, and you will not be condemned; forgive, and you will be forgiven; give, and it will be given to you. Good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over, will be put into your lap. For with the measure you use it will be measured back to you.”” (Luke 6:27-38)
Be like Jesus? Loving enemies, turning the other cheek, giving to all that ask. Not me. I want to be rich. I want to be powerful. I want vengeance. If I could find the men who came into my house, who terrorized my family, who put a gun to the head of my little girl… I’d not only put a gun to their heads, but I’d pull the trigger. It’s been over 10 years, but I can still feel a rush of anger and hate. I don’t want to share the gospel with them. I don’t want them to come to God. Like Jonah sitting and waiting for Nineveh to be destroyed, I want to see them punished. Bring on the brimstone!
Tim doesn’t want to be like Jesus. That’s what Paul calls “the flesh,” “the old man.” My carnal side. It doesn’t want to be like Jesus. So I rationalize and explain why Jesus didn’t really mean what he said, why following Jesus’ teachings isn’t practical in the 21st century. I might even argue that the gospels don’t apply to Christians. The easiest solution, of course, is to say that Jesus was the Son of God, so of course he could live that way. I’m just a man, so I can’t be expected to be that good.
Fortunately, God has put within me his Spirit. That’s the only hope I have of overcoming Tim, the only hope of being freed from “this body of death.” Only by God’s power can I begin to be who God wants me to be. And I want to be who God wants me to be. It’s Tim that doesn’t want that. It’s my sarx, my flesh.
Lord, help me to follow your Spirit rather than mine.
I was going to take it and rework it to sound nice and pretty for the blog. But I think I’ll just let you read the rough version.