The ninth of ten affirmations about marriage is this:
God hates divorce; God loves divorced people.
Yesterday we talked about recovering the first part of that statement, of proclaiming and living as a church the fact that divorce goes against what God wants. Today I want to reflect some on the second part of the statement: God loves divorced people.
It’s not easy to combat divorce without communicating some sort of assault on those who are divorced. We need to remember that those people have not removed themselves from the reach of God’s love. Divorce is not the unforgivable sin. Even a divorce that was carried out in a sinful manner can still be forgiven by God.
This isn’t the post where I look at all the ins and outs of divorce and remarriage. I may do that someday, but today isn’t that day. My point today is that even as we denounce divorce as being contrary to God’s will, we need to let divorced people know that God’s grace reaches them just as it reaches us. Whether they’ve been wronged or they have wronged another, God can heal that hurt and wash away all sin. Divorce need not define who they’ve been nor who they are going forward.
If we are going to stem the tide of divorce and speak with a prophetic voice to the generations to come, we will need the help of all Christians: single, married, divorced. We all need to affirm with one voice this two-faceted truth: God hates divorce; God loves divorced people.
So again, here’s affirmation #9: God hates divorce; God loves divorced people.
As one who has been divorced, I affirm that any divorce, regardless of the reason, is devastating and not in keeping with God’s will. And one of the devastating consequences of divorce is that, it’s difficult, even after many years, not to define ourselves as ” the divorced” and let that define us moving forward. I agree with the accuracy of Affirmation #9, but, for those who
To complete my post.
…. but, for those who struggle with this identification, perhaps a better way to state #9 would be to say that God hates divorce, but loves all sinners.
Yes, I guess there is a bit of irony in my saying that we need to help those who have suffered divorce move beyond that in terms of their identity, then saying “God loves the divorced. You’re right to call me out on that.