Tag Archives: Communication

It’s hard not to be a jerk

3 Replies

It’s hard not to be a jerk. Harder for some of us than others. We go through life, hopefully growing in knowledge and understanding. As we do, we want to enlighten others around us with our new insights. And we often do it in the wrong way.

It happens to people when they become Christians. Many overwhelm friends and families, expecting them to share the same enthusiasm for their new-found beliefs. It happens when people join multi-level marketing networks. Or when they find a diet that works for them.

It happens as our religious views change over time. We often look at others a bit condescendingly, expecting them to eventually arrive at the “better place” we find ourselves in. Or we study a certain view, reject it, then want to help those who accept it to see the error of their ways.

It can be done well. I’m not good at it. I’m better at being a jerk. I like playing with words and phrases, and I can use that in belittling ways. I’m trying to do better, but it’s a weakness of mine.

I’ll try harder. I want to share the things I’ve come to believe, convictions I’ve come to hold, while having enough humility to recognize that I could be mistaken. Along the way, sometimes I’ll be a jerk. But I’m trying not to be.

photo by Marijke Baan

Preaching styles and thinking styles

2 Replies

I read an article last week that talked about the method behind the madness of those scam e-mails we get. As the article summary says, “An analysis from Microsoft Research suggests that Nigerian scammers need to sound as ridiculous as possible, so that only the most gullible will reply to them.” Interesting.

Somehow, my mind connected that with a study that Flavil Yeakley did years ago, an in depth study of the Boston Movement done by invitation of Kip McKean and staff. One of the most helpful parts of the study, in my opinion, was a look at what other churches could learn from the methods being used in Boston. Among other things, Yeakley pointed out that the outreach methods used by the Boston group were much more likely to appeal to extroverts, whereas the methods used by traditional churches of Christ tended to appeal to introverts.

Those two unrelated bits of information swirled in my brain and got me thinking about evangelism and preaching. Specifically, I was thinking about how a certain kind of person is reached by a certain kind of teaching and, conversely, different people are attracted to different teaching styles. That’s hardly big news, yet it would explain the gulf that tends to grow up in every movement between “traditionalists” and “progressives.”

Does that make sense? I could throw out some examples that come to my mind, but I’d rather hear yours. Can you think of ways in which this would be true? If it is, then how do we achieve unity in spite of this trend?

Sesquipedalophobic musings

5 Replies

OK, I’ll admit it. I suffer from a mild case of sesquipedalophobia. That’s the fear of long words, of course. (Don’t believe those that claim that the appropriate word is hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia. That word was made up as a joke)

Well, maybe I’m not really afraid of long words. But I don’t care for them. More than long words, I dislike fancy words. It’s my belief that if you can’t explain a concept in fairly common terms, then you don’t fully understand it. There are times, I guess, when a big word is the most appropriate. But those times are rare.

I feel the same way about jargon. When you’re in a discussion and someone says, “Oh, so you take a Hognobian approach to that problem,” I can’t help but wonder who the person is trying to impress. I’ve talked before about my dislike of labels. High falutin’ labels are especially distasteful to me.

I like the story of the farmer who, while conversing with a graduate student, didn’t hesitate to say, “Why don’t you take that big word back and give me two or three little ones?” If you want to impress me with your knowledge, explain your views in a way that the non-expert can understand. If you really want to impress me, speak in such a way that a 10-year-old can follow you.

The most impressive, of course, is the person who speaks in such a way that even I can understand them.